


Timing is Everything

by IAmNotGoodatthisnamingthing



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Broken XingDae, How Do I Tag, KaiXing, M/M, i think?!?, kailay - Freeform, side baeksoo, side xiuhan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-04
Updated: 2017-02-04
Packaged: 2018-09-21 23:21:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9571424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IAmNotGoodatthisnamingthing/pseuds/IAmNotGoodatthisnamingthing
Summary: It becomes a thing. Jongin asking Jongdae about Yixing.And Jongdae answers them, patiently, and with more and more amusement each time. He’s the best friend, isn’t he? The one who knows Yixing best?





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [caesiumlight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/caesiumlight/gifts).



It starts innocuously enough.

“Hyung, what is Yixing hyung’s favorite tea?”, Jongin asks, draping himself over Jongdae’s left shoulder.

“Huh?”, Jongdae asks, looking up from his phone distractedly. “Oh, it’s green. Ge likes it with honey.”

“Green with honey”, Jongin parrots a couple of times, before smiling sweetly. “Thanks hyung!”, he squeezes Jongdae’s shoulder before happily skipping away.

Jongdae shakes his head affectionately, before returning to his game. He’s just 20 points behind Luhan’s high score, and he can’t wait to wipe the smug smile off the elder’s pretty face.

-

It becomes a thing.

Jongin asking Jongdae about Yixing.

_What’s his favorite color?_

_What flavor shampoo does he use?_

_Did he pack a hoodie before coming?_

_Do you think he’d like bath bombs?_

And Jongdae answers them, patiently, and with more and more amusement each time.

He’s the best friend, isn’t he? The one who knows Yixing best? Especially now…that Luhan hyung and Kris hyung have _officially_ been removed from their lives. ( _Their group chat and weekly skype sessions were a different matter altogether though_ ).

It happens, again and again, so much so that Jongdae actually approaches Yixing. “You know, I’m beginning to think our Jonginnie has a not-so-subtle crush on you.”, he teases, waggling his eyebrows.

“Oh?”, Yixing asks in that endearing way of his, tilting his head to the side.

“Yeah, he keeps on asking me about your favorite things”, Jongdae laughs, waving at Minseok, who’d just walked into the dorm.

“Hmm”, Yixing hums, swirling the tea in his half-empty cup. Tea that Jongdae had watched Jongin make and almost burn his fingers over. “And you keep on telling him?”

“Well who am I to get in the way of young love?”, he ribs Yixing’s elbow and cackles.

“Who are you indeed?”, Yixing says casually, the weight of his stare lost on Jongdae, who’s already gotten up to move towards the kitchen where Baekhyun and Kyungsoo are gossiping.

-

They are on the 2nd floor of the SM building, and Jongdae crumples his eleventh paper ball of the night.

“It’s not working”, he growls, looking at his blank notebook in distaste. They’d been cooped up for most of the afternoon, ever since Yixing had sent over the instrumental demo, and the.words.just.wouldn’t.come.

“Maybe we should take a break”, Chanyeol mumbles around a yawn.

“I can’t”, Jongdae says obstinately, crossing his arms and slouching in his chair.

“Why not?”, Chanyeol asks from where he’s taken to rest his head on the table.

“Because”, Jongdae says intelligently. _Because it’s Yixing’s song, and Jongdae wants to honor him. Jongdae wants him to be proud._

Chanyeol sighs, before standing up. “Whatever. I’m taking a break. And a nap. Wake me if you need help penning the chorus. And try and not take out your frustrations on what we’ve written so far.”

What we’ve written so far amounted to the rap Chanyeol had come up within 2 hours of the conference call with Yixing, the prechorus and what seemed like the skeleton of two stanzas, and the theme of the song that Yixing had conveyed, written meticulously on the board in Jongdae’s tight script, and underlined thrice for importance.

Jongdae hums in answer to Chanyeol, and watches as his friend packs up his bag, and makes for the door.

“If you need help, you could always call Yixing hyung”, Chanyeol helpfully provides from the door. “He should be awake at this hour.”

Jongdae stares at his notebook for 5 more minutes before heeding the advice. Yixing picks up on the 2nd ring.

“Jongdae, everything alright?”, he asks immediately, voice laced with concern.

“I’m sorry to call you so late. It’s just…”, Jongdae closes his eyes and heaves out a sigh. “Your demo, I’m trying to write the lyrics, and the words just won’t come. It’s 10pm, I haven’t had anything since lunch, and I’m pretty sure Yeol just ditched me, but I can’t write a stupid verse.”

“Chen”, Yixing chastises affectionately. “Go eat, and then sleep. Don’t drive yourself mad over this”

“Ge, it’s your song, and I don’t wanna disappoint you. I just want you to be proud”, he replies, in a small voice.

Yixing pauses for an infinite moment before speaking.

“I am proud. And thankful. To both you and Chanyeol. For trying. But don’t burden yourself over this. We can hand the melody to our production team and they can-”

“No!”, Jongdae interrupts vehemently. “It’s our song. We’re penning this. Besides, we’re done with most of it anyway.”

“See, then there’s nothing to worry about!”, Yixing says cheerfully. “Relax. The words will come. Don’t overwork yourself, okay?”

“Okay”, he says, relaxing infinitesimally. “Thanks for the talk. I’ll let you go back to whatever you were doing. What were you doing?”

“Spamming duizhang’s  inbox with photos of Lu ge’s smile”, Yixing bites out casually. “You know that smile? The one that-”

“Unhinges his jaw and makes him look like a psycho murderer? Yeah”, Jongdae chuckles fondly. “Well I’ll let you get back to your productive work. Take care, ge.”

“You too, Jongdae-ah. Love you.”

“Love you too”, Jongdae smiled, hanging up the phone, feeling calmer than he had for a few hours.

He looks down at the paper where he’d been doodling during the conversation, and finds a crudely drawn caricature of Kris with horns, angry eyebrows and a Chaplin stache. And a few words written near it. _Sorry. Thank You. Love You._

His hands start moving of their own accord, and by the time Chanyeol comes back, holding a can of coke and a sandwich, Jongdae has penned out most of what will later come to be known as Promise.

-

It’s been three weeks.

Three weeks since Tao decided to leave, and their splintered family loses yet another member.

Three weeks for weariness and disenchantment to seep in, and for doubts to grow.

Most of their doubts seem angled towards Yixing, their last Chinese member. The one who could shine so bright if he decided to up and leave. The one who could outdo the success of Luhan and Kris even, with his many talents and warm personality. The one Baekhyun turns to, with trepidation in his voice, and asks, “Hyung, will you leave us too?”

“No”, he replies firmly, to Baekhyun, eyes weary with the burdens he bears.

“No”, he repeats, turning to look every member scattered around their den, taking time to lock eyes with each of them, to reassure them that he was here, and he would be here, and that they could lean on him.

“No”, he whispers, face crumbling into something heartbroken, when he looks at Jongdae, and feels the inhibitions and mistrust staring back at him.

Jongdae ducks his head, but the damage has been done. The room lapses into silence, the sound from the TV almost deafening, and Yixing claims exhaustion, and retires to his room to rest. Jongdae stares steadfast at the screen, ignoring the many gazes fixed on him and what they insinuate.

_He **is** the best friend. Who should go comfort Yixing. Who should have had more trust in Yixing. Who should not feel numb, the broken look on Yixing’s face embedded into his brain._

“I’m gonna go…see if hyung needs something”, Jongin says meekly, softly, getting up and smoothing down his shirt.

“I’ll come with”, Baekhyun says casually, voice steady and wrapped with concern.

As they make their exit, everyone turns their attention back to the film, and Jongdae finally breathes easy. _This too shall pass_.

Later that night, when he sneaks into the room he shares with Yixing, he finds the elder asleep, sandwiched between Jongin and Baekhyun, head pillowed on Jongin’s chest and body bracketed by both of their arms, and Jongdae turns off the light, trying to ignore the dark emotions boiling in his stomach.

-

Yixing takes to avoiding him, and Jongdae lets him.

He watches, from a distance, as Yixing flits to and from China, heads to practice on mere hours of sleep, and chooses to listen to the dorm gossip instead of finishing the food on his plate.

He learns, from Chanyeol, that he’s approached their management about debuting solo. From Jongin, that he spends hours at the company, practicing, and sometimes treating their trainees. From Baekhyun, that he’s going to miss spending New Year’s with them, because of a gig back home.

He watches, and ignores the nudges to his ribs from Minseok, who is stronger than he looks. And also what he hints.

Jongdae has misgivings. He is cautious.

Luhan left, and he’d seen what a toll it took on Minseok, especially as time passed by, and Luhan got busier and busier, till his and Minseok’s constant messaging became daily calls, and daily calls became biweekly Skype sessions, where Minseok would throw Jongdae out of their shared room, in favor of giving his undivided attention to Luhan.

Jongdae thinks of how close he and Yixing used to be. Best friends, and roommates too. How he’d snap a picture of a _hanzi_ character he was confused about, and Yixing would immediately call back to explain the meaning and pronunciation, and how somehow that query would kickstart a conversation about everything and nothing that would more than usually end after 3 am.

Jongdae thinks of that, and of their gnawing recent distance, and he lets it be.

He’s cautious, after all. He doesn’t want to be hurt.

Jongdae thinks of how much it would hurt if Yixing leaves. How his heart would splinter into irreparable pieces if his ge decides to abandon them.

 _Jongdae doesn’t think of why he compares his situation with that of Luhan and Minseok, especially knowing that they were more soulmates than friends, and Yixing – as per Jongdae himself – was only his best friend_ ; and so when Yixing takes to avoiding him…

Jongdae lets him.

-

Avoiding Jongdae turns into Yixing growing closer to others.

Like Chanyeol and Baekhyun, who ply him with food and gossip and hugs the moment they set eyes on him, and Jongin and Sehun, who use their maknae privileges to smother him into cuddles every other time they see him.

Minseok, as always, is Yixing’s close confidante, a bond they developed and grown into over being the only ones awake at ungodly morning hours in what had been the M dorm; and the two continue to remain thick as thieves, especially while planning pranks on Luhan. Luhan remains bemused and _slightly_ terrified whenever he finds out those two have been hanging out, while Minseok and Yixing only clash their coffee cups together in camaraderie.

Even Junmyeon and Kyungsoo make time to pamper Yixing however they can, and its only Jongdae who walks past him with a blank look nowadays.

But just because he pretends to not see doesn’t mean he doesn’t. He sees how Yixing’s smile dims when Jongdae brushes past him yet again. He sees how Yixing becomes skinnier with time, and even industrial makeup fails to hide the exhaustion on his pale face.

Jongdae notices how Minseok asks to room with him – _because Jongdae must be lonely in that room all the time, and Minseok doesn’t mind sharing_ – and how that proposal came about after a not-so-hushed discussion between Minseok and Baekhyun about the awkwardness between him and Yixing.

He notices that Yixing doesn’t realize till the third night he’s back that Jongdae has relocated, and that only because Junmyeon asks whether he’s fine sleeping all alone in the corner room. Jongdae pretends it doesn’t sting, and that the salad is especially delicious that night. _It isn’t_. _It does_.

He pretends not to see how a shiny-eyed Jongin offers to room with Yixing if he gets too lonely, and how a pretty blush spreads down his neck when Yixing takes him up on the offer. He pretends not to see Yixing studying the crown of Jongin’s head thoughtfully either.

Thankfully, Baekhyun finds a solitary piece of cucumber on his plate, making all hell break lose, as Junmyeon tries to convince him he added no cucumber to the salad (and Chanyeol sneaks $10 to Sehun, who videos the whole thing). _And still, Yixing studies Jongin with that contemplative look in his eyes._

-

There are some things Jongdae doesn’t want to be privy too, but life doesn’t quite always see eye to eye with his wishes.

It is how he’d come to know that Luhan had bought a coffee-flavored lip balm off the internet, because Minseok really liked the _taste_ of coffee.

It is also how he’d learned that Baekhyun _always_ sat beside Kyungsoo while watching Ghibli animes, because they apparently made Kyungsoo weirdly emotional, and in need of cuddles, and would you look at that? Baekhyun was sitting right by his side, looking perfectly huggable!

It also is how he comes to know that Jongin indeed has a full-blown crush on Yixing. Jongdae doesn’t need or want to know, but he does anyway. Because he’s helping Junmyeon cook dinner, and that is the time Jongin decides to barge in, and inform their leader that he was going to make a move on Yixing. Soon.

Junmyeon becomes flustered, and after stammering a few times, manages to give his blessings to Jongin. And Jongdae pretends that his insides aren’t constricting painfully. _He’s fine. He has to be, because not being fine means…nothing! He is fine….so why does everything hurt?_

-

From that point on, all Jongdae can see is Yixing. And Jongin. Yixing and Jongin. Yixing with Jongin.

Yixing, wrapping his pretty fingers around Jongin’s shoulders and kneading as the younger lolled his head back and relaxed into the massage. Jongin, abandoning his old chair to squeeze in between Minseok and Yixing during dinner. Yixing, parading around in Jongin’s shirts, and caps, and even shorts, when he’d had another moment of forgetfulness while packing. Jongin, smelling of Yixing’s shampoo as he settles into the van beside Jongdae, and slides open his phone screen to reveal a selfie of the their faces squished together.

In what seems to be just one moment to Jongdae, Jongin goes from bashfully staring at Yixing stretching during practices, to holding him steadily by the waist and guiding him to his/their room after dinner, accompanied by Sehun and Baekhyun’s catcalls to remember safety first.

It all seems to be happening so fast, and Jongdae doesn’t like it, not one bit.

Did they have to flaunt their relationship so openly? Could they not try and be subtle?

“Is that what’s really bothering you?”, Baekhyun asks him, when Jongdae voices his grievances, after having watched the aforementioned duo yet again sneak out for a secret date, hands entwined, hoodies and face masks firmly in place.

He opens his mouth to ask Baekhyun what the bloody hell does he mean, and maybe mouth off a bit, but the stare that Kyungsoo – who’s plastered to Baekhyun’s side, fingers playing with the hem of Baekhyun’s shorts – fixes him with, makes Jongdae fall silent.

-

It isn’t till the next time Yixing comes around that Jongdae understands what Baekhyun and Kyungsoo had meant.

Jongdae returns back from another fruitful day of recording, and feeling pleased, makes for the kitchen, where he hopes to make himself some tea – sweet and iced.

He’s brought up short by the sight greeting him in the living room…

Sehun is lying across Yixing’s lap, Yixing’s fingers playing with his hair, as Sehun practices his Mandarin pronunciation. This would be a normal scene, because the maknae did tend to treat people around him as pillows, but it wasn’t.

Because, huddled behind Yixing, one arm wrapped possessively around his torso, happens to be Jongin, who is busy distracting Yixing with insistent kisses to the nape of his neck. Jongdae watches, frozen to the spot, as Yixing turns – possibly to scold Jongin – and Jongin uses the opportunity to seal their mouths together, and buries his free hand in Yixing’s hair.

It isn’t until Yixing sneaks a hand between their bodies and into Jongin’s shirt that Jongdae snaps back to reality and rushes back to his room.

His stomach seems intent on emptying itself of the salmon he’d eaten for lunch, and he has to clap a shaking hand across his mouth because _he finally understands_.

He is in love with Yixing. All this time...he’d been in love with Yixing. Yixing, who’d been his best friend. Yixing who’d dotingly call him ChenChen and let him cuddle up to him during movie nights. Yixing, who’d let him sob into his shirt when duizhang had left, and Jongdae had been a mess. Yixing, who’d relentlessly tease him one moment, then hug him like his life depended on it the next moment.

Yixing, who…..was with Jongin.

And happy.

And an unfathomable reach away from Jongdae...because he’d let him go. He’d let him slip away.

Jongdae hadn’t known, not consciously at least, and now that he did….

…he was going to let it be.

Because his ge looked happy, happier than he’d been in a while. Happy to be with Jongin.

Jongin, who forced Yixing to go to bed on time because otherwise Jongin would again fall asleep on his shoulder while he composed.

Jongin, who reassured Yixing that he was loved, and missed, and no one minded that he had to be away.

Jongin, who always packed an extra cardigan into Yixing’s bag, and waited up with green tea when the elder’s flights landed, and forced Kyungsoo to live-translate Yixing’s Chinese dialogues whenever he happened to show up on TV, and did a hundred little things that made Yixing feel at home, and in love.

So, no, Jongdae wasn’t going to complicate things by being selfish. He was going to find solace in Yixing finding happiness. Starting tomorrow.

And tonight? Tonight, he’d wallow. Wrapped in a blanket, nursing a mug of cocoa that he’d force Minseok to make (and send pictures of to Luhan, because he was allowed to be petty like that). Tonight, he’d feel sorry for himself, because come tomorrow, he’d begin - slowly but surely - mending things between Yixing and him.

He was the best friend, wasn’t he? The confidante? He’d be that once again.

 _And maybe, with time, that would be enough for him_.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading (and sorry for any typos)! I'd really appreciate it if you left me some feedback :)
> 
> P.S. I almost titled this Romance is Over, but then decided to save Leo’s song name for Leo’s angst fic…soon.  
> P.S.S There's a connecting one shot [Alibi](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9571451). Be sure to check that out too!


End file.
